No more service?!?!

At the beginning of March I was hit with some very heavy news: I might not graduate because I had so much work to do on my thesis. I didn’t know if this was the 100% truth or if my research mentor was just telling me this to scare the bejesus out of me. Either way I was shocked to my core. She then asked me about my schedule. So I did the run down…12 credits, tutoring on campus, and service project at Davidson middle 5 days a week. That almost knocked her out of her seat. For some reason she heard 5 days a week and assumed I was locked in human servitude. I tried to convince her that my service at Davidson was the not the problem in getting started on my thesis (rather a lack of motivation), but she refused to hear it. In her opinion I had to quit, not just one or two days but ALL FIVE DAYS!

I couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t bear to think about leaving Davidson. I wasn’t fazed by the fact that there was no regard for my service work and how it was also tied to my class work. I was just blown away by the simplest possibility that I had to leave. Until that moment I never realized how important my service there meant to me. I go there not because of a class requirement; if that was the case I wouldn’t show up five days a week. I go there because the kids in the afterschool program mean a lot to me. It means so much to them to have a consistent role model, someone they can bring their problems to, believe in and trust. I go there because I want to make a difference and I can see the changes I have already made. When my mentor told me to leave, I felt like someone had ripped out my spirit.

During the month, I missed a lot of time at Davidson because I was trying to appease my mentor in addition to going on graduate interviews. I finally returned four days ago and was in for a shock. A significant portion of the kids were disenchanted and a few had quit the program. I was sufficiently floored. I don’t credit my students’ progress to just myself, but a lot of them rely on me. For me not to be there for a month was a crime. That was it for me. I realized that I needed to be there.

I realize that I do need to spend time working on my thesis, but I need and want to be at DMS as well. I think it is important for us to realize that we are integral parts in the service projects we are working on. We may think that what we do may not have an impact, that our work doesn’t matter. But all you have to do is step back for a minute (or a month) and see what happens. You’ll be surprised what a difference a person can make. If you acknowledge it, it will only help you to further accomplish your goals. If you refuse to recognize it, then the opportunity to make a positive change will pass you by. Needless to say I am still doing my service work at Davidson Middle School – 3 days a week.